I listen to my body most of the time. However, the moment I have deadlines (even ones I've personally made) that are nearing or people I (perceived and actually) need to help, self-care goes out the window.
Today was a victory.
I realized that I cannot enter all the service hours of all the students, order awards, lead all the service activities, plan for and lead two classes, reflect, work on my projects, etc and take care of myself properly without a single day full day off. I need to take care of me, especially in the midst of madness.
I often tell people who are worriers about things to ask, "What is the worst (realistically) thing that can happen?" It is something Major in JROTC once said at a dance and it has applied to the entirety of my life. Though the deadline to order awards for them to arrive on time with normal shipping has passed, what was the worse that would happen? The answer? We have to pay $25 for expedited shipping.
My head is screaming because that is a waste of money and it was my fault (to an extent). Yet I really took the moment today to say, "well since I already passed it, I can take my day off (tomorrow) that I normally work and take care of myself."
My personal well being is worth $25.
I still have time with this new shipping date to get it in and have awards by graduation. Tonight I "met" my new nephew via video chat and tomorrow I'm making the choice to take care of myself so that the next day I can be at full power instead of 12%. Making this choice is something I am working on.