Learning to listen to my body

I listen to my body most of the time. However, the moment I have deadlines (even ones I've personally made) that are nearing or people I (perceived and actually) need to help, self-care goes out the window.

Today was a victory.

I realized that I cannot enter all the service hours of all the students, order awards, lead all the service activities,  plan for and lead two classes, reflect, work on my projects, etc and take care of myself properly without a single day full day off. I need to take care of me, especially in the midst of madness. 

I often tell people who are worriers about things to ask, "What is the worst (realistically) thing that can happen?" It is something Major in JROTC once said at a dance and it has applied to the entirety of my life. Though the deadline to order awards for them to arrive on time with normal shipping has passed, what was the worse that would happen? The answer? We have to pay $25 for expedited shipping.

My head is screaming because that is a waste of money and it was my fault (to an extent). Yet I really took the moment today to say, "well since I already passed it, I can take my day off (tomorrow) that I normally work and take care of myself."

My personal well being is worth $25.

I still have time with this new shipping date to get it in and have awards by graduation. Tonight I "met" my new nephew via video chat and tomorrow I'm making the choice to take care of myself so that the next day I can be at full power instead of 12%. Making this choice is something I am working on.

Gimme, gimme, gimme

It's tough. Coordinating and managing student volunteers is incredibly difficult. I'm not talking about the complaints, tardiness or forgetfulness but the difference of attitude towards service.

Me: What can I give?
Student: What do I get?

I had a student who ended up not participating in a service activity because I grew more and more frustrated. He kept asking me what we were going to eat, what exactly is being served, if we can go get hamburgers, if we can stop before we go there, etc.

I answered his questions as best as I could but in the end, I ignored him. Not the best tactic. I found myself growing angry and resentful. I knew I didn't want to take it out on him, so I stopped talking and waited for him to leave.

Oh the pondering one does after such an occurrence. I really was put in my place when I realized that it is not the students that already volunteer and who's first thoughts are "what can I give?" that I need to be trying to get to serve. Instead, I need to focus on the students like the one who annoyed me. Students like him need experiences like the ones I offer in order to get their feet wet in service and possibly ignite a flame for giving.

How can I expect anyone who doesn't already volunteer to want to if I don't react with patience and understanding? How can I expect anyone to continue to do service in the future if I don't get them (even the pains in the butts) to try it out for the first time?


I can be the bridge or the wall. Though it may not be easy to handle such an opposite view towards service, I need to try my best to intentionally be a bridge.

My Best Friend is Flying in

My best friend Jamie is flying in to see me in Colorado. It's rather exciting having a friend visit me where I live. My emotions are through the roof knowing that even though I tend to move far away, my best friend is still super excited to come see me!

These couple of days are going to be outstanding.

• Cookie dough and a movie
• 4th of July Festivities
• Crashing the YMCA international parade
• A Car Show
• Hiking
• Touring campus
• Sliding on a big slide
• Lots and lots of stories, laughter and love.

I can't wait till your shuttle gets here!!!

 Jamie and I in Oklahoma, December 2012